Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Chapter 24 and Epilogue

Yep, last post. In case you missed it, here were the previous chapters:

Prologue, 1, 2
Chapters 3, 4, 5
Chapters 6, 7, 8
Chapter 9, 10, 11
Chapters 12, 13, 14
Chapters 15, 16, 17
Chapters 18, 19, 20
Chapters 21, 22, 23




CHAPTER 24

Oh Meyer you BITCH you took my vampire fight away from me! @%%@$%&*!%@#$!#$% How fucking anti-climactic was that?? *prepares to throw book across room*

Fell down two flights of stairs and out a window? Yeah. Coz that explains a vampire bite on her hand, and, yannow, knuckle and boot-shaped bruises all over her. Riiiiiiiiiight. And I'm sure everyone believes that Edward didn't push her down these imaginary stairs when merely a few days before Bella ran out of the house all emotional screaming that she broke up with him and was flying to Arizona. (I mean, both were lies, but come on. A third grader wouldn't believe that shit, even with the fabricated evidence.)

Oh good, at least someone is on to Edward's obsessive behavior.

He's on the verge of breaking up with her for her own good. DO IT. Do it or so help me I will find a way to punch your fictitious self!

*headdesk* Help me, emo-one kenobi, you're my only hope. *headdesk*

"I'll be the first to admit that I have no experience with relationships," I said. "But it just seems logical... a man and a woman have to be somewhat equal... as in, one of them can't always be swooping in and saving the other one. They have to save each other equally."

^^ Rational thinking. I think I just fainted.

... And then she turns around and says that she basically can't live without him. Make up your damned mind. Are you TSTL or are you smart? Pick one.

"It's possible to take bravery to the point where it becomes insanity." Do you see this? This is me glaring.

Pain meds, promises, and we're done. I am very unsatisfied right now.


EPILOGUE

The Prom. *snort*

Aww, poor Jacob. That guy is sweet. He's got a message for her, what is it? HA! Billy Black doesn't believe the stairs excuse, either. I like that guy.

I love you... I'm not worthy... I love you... I'm not worthy... gawd, get over yourselves already. Bella has an excuse but you're a hundred years old, Edward.



CONCLUSION

Can I just say worst climax EVER in the history of bad climaxes? There was so much buildup in that short period of time and then the story just... stopped. I waited 400 friggin' pages before outside conflict happened and then there was no climax. What. The. Hell. Okay, yes, there was an emo-filled happily ever after, but it was wholly unsatisfying as a) there was no climax to come down from and b) they are such a disaster that you know, even without the other books, that they are going to have issues after the temporary HEA is over.

Now that I've given you a play-by-play of my reactions I wanted to give you a general "this is what I think and why" but I'm too pissed to do it right now. Maybe tomorrow.

Fuck, I have three more of these damned books to read. Someone shoot me.


~Sass~

3 comments:

Briony said...

Hey! I stumbled onto your blog from the AW forums :)

I hear you with Twilight. I have been talked into reading the rest of them, by my mother oddly enough who got them for her birthday. (She was a bit confused at first but loves them now)

DeadlyAccurate said...

She must dislike writing fight scenes.

I'm still failing to find the plot in all this. A girl and a boy fall in love and it's all angsty. OK. And?

I guess it's just not my thing.

amybai said...

I also failed to find the plot. I think it's a where's waldo kinda deal.

Brave Sass. I choked my way through Twilight and managed not to set it on fire, but there's absolutely no frikkin way I'm getting near any of the rest of them. I salute you.