Twilight: The Lost Script

This deserves it's own post. Why? Because it's full of win. Thanks amybai for the link a few posts back. You have no idea how much I <3 you right now! (And I lawled in the office, just so you know.)

Twilight: The Lost Script

The entire book (so far) can actually be summed up on the 5th slide there. It goes something like this (quoted straight from that article):

EDWARD: Oh my God! What happened to your ears! Did someone hurt you, my love?

BELLA: What? I can't hear you. I'm wearing my earbuds and rocking out. Have I told you today that you are gorgeous? Your torso looks like it's carved from marble. Who cares that your skin's so cold... more I have to wear a blanket when we snuggle? You're yummy!

EDWARD: OK, if you can't hear me, then I will whisper the words I've longed to utter for a century. I love you. Love, love, love, kissy, kissy.

BELLA: Um, Edward, I was just kidding. I can still hear you when I have my earbuds on.

EDWARD: I meant every word of it. You are the sweet love of my life. My nostrils flare to embrace your intoxicating scent.

BELLA: Do you have any Tic Tacs? I feel like I should, I don't know, eat a breath mint or something. We're going to kiss soon, right?

EDWARD: I fear my passions will overwhelm me. Let us just hold hands and take another ride in my swift, swift Volvo.

BELLA: Can't hear you. Earbuds.

Arr Ohh Eff Ell, I saiz.

Quote of the day:

(Young Frankenstein)
Elizabeth: [singing, while having sex with the monster] Oh, sweet mystery of life at last I've found you! At last, I know the secret of it all!


~Sass~